Displaying All Posts by Cubicle Curtis

How to Escape Your Cubicle & Work From Home

I don’t blame you for not wanting to come to work. It’s a good job. But why do we have to get dressed and make that awful commute to this building every day? Surely there’s a better way.

It’s possible to do all this from home. Think about how much money you can save on gas and parking. You could avoid being exposed to H1N1. You can have all this—except for the engaging conversation with me—all from the comfort of home.

If you’re going to sell this to our boss, you’re going to need a good reason. And it’s not going to have anything to do with being able to work in your pajamas or avoid the commute to the office. This has to create benefits for the company, not just you.

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How to Take Productive Breaks

It wouldn’t kill you to take a break. Really. I know we got this “nose to the grindstone” culture going. But there is some rationale for taking breaks. Basically, the mind starts to wind down about 3 p.m., and it becomes hard to keep up the mental pace that gets you through the day.

And physically, your body needs the break. Your eyes need to focus on something that isn’t a computer monitor. Your circulatory system needs a reason to pump more blood. All those muscles in your legs need some action while the muscles in your arms and hands need a break.

Even so, you need to be productive. You want to be useful all the time. Maybe you can have your cake and eat it too if you try these productive breaks:

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How to Fix That Mistake

Wow, you really screwed that up. Yeah, they’re going to be mad. The good news is that it’s not the worst thing that anyone has done. A little bit later I can tell you how I screwed up the RFP on the Donavan account. Yeah, you don’t know what that is, because they dropped us like a rock.

Calm down and remember that no mistake is fatal. Here’s what you need to do now.

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How to Stop Interruptions

We interrupt this productive work day to bring you this special message on how to avoid distractions.

Hey, you busy? Sorry to interrupt, but I have some ideas on what you can do about all those distractions and interruptions getting in the way of your work. Let’s review what’s keeping you from finishing that report.

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How to Gain Respect in Your Office

You are your own worst enemy. We don’t take you seriously at work because you don’t give us much reason to. You can get the respect you deserve only after you start acting like you deserve it. The good news is that you can control this and create positive change.

Look at yourself and how you’re dressed.

What? If dressing in a way that expresses your individuality is wrong, you don’t want to be right? If you want us to take you seriously, then you need to look like someone we can take seriously. Hey, if we’re so shallow, what do you care what we think?
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How to Prepare for a Layoff

It’s not you, it’s the economy. You’re doing everything at work that you need to do. You’re giving it 110 percent. But there are these nasty little signs: there’s a moratorium on office supplies spending. You won’t be reimbursed for taking clients to lunch. There’s another memo about cutting overtime. Everyone else in this industry is cutting staff.

So it looks like you’re going to become an unemployment statistic, but you can’t say for sure. Instead of waiting for some clarity, prepare now. That doesn’t mean stealing pens and sticky notes—there are steps you can take to put yourself in a decent position if a layoff happens. But if you keep your job, you want to be in good standing.

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